Feng Shui and the Far Corners of My Home

Yesterday afternoon my new friend Jessica came over for tea. At 4 o'clock. A rather proper tea I might add. Unusual for this dyed in the wool New England village.

Nonetheless, I dusted off (rinsed out really) my underused blue on grey porcelain Royal Copenhagen Tranguebar tea and coffee service schlepped by my parents on the plane from their wintertime visit to Denmark in 1969. Gifts for each of their three girls. Not sure what Willy received, but I am confident it wasn't a tea service.

Mom disembarked into the International Terminal at JFK in New York wearing a most gorgeous pin seal coat from Berger Christianson ... (which incidentally hangs four decades later in my closet lengthened six inches from its original style when dresses and skirts were Mary Quant short-short never to be worn again for fear of someone throwing red paint in my direction protesting the murder of innocent endangered Scandinavian sea mammals). Not sure what Dad's souvenir was ... although I do remember some Aquavit on the bar when I was home that Christmas.

Jessica is my cohort at the cavernous 12,000 square foot antiques shop where I dally on a very very limited part-time basis ... and she works regularly.

Jessica, the self-proclaimed Obama Mama hales from a Nordic line herself and has the lemon white locks and azure eyes to prove it. She is an interior designer who needn't rely on workrooms because she can slipcover and make curtains like no one's business. A bona fide pizza oven is nested into the wall of her study next to the fireplace where her organic flatbread creations utilize only those ingredients grown in her five-acre yard replete with pond and cat-tails in the country. The whole wheat flour ground by her own hand from select crops across our country. She is most talented. Knowing Jessica is like having a jack-of-all homemaking trades at my disposal.

But one of the most fascinating parts of Jessica's not-so-hidden allure is her ability to commune with nature spirits and, using herbs and tinctures grown around the pond in her lush vast gardens, make concoctions that heal what ails you. No. Not the psychedelics. But real remedies like the Native Americans or early pioneers.

So when she appeared at my front door she first regaled in my home. Its lovely accessorized and wallpapered rooms, an eclectic mix of antiques and hand-me-downs from my grandmothers with a pink flamingo lamp or a contemporary brass sculpture tossed in casually. She loved my home. And that made me smile.

But then she wanted to know which door (I have five leading to the outdoors. Imagine five in an 1800 square foot home!) I use to enter and exit the house.

We share an eclectic spirit, adventuresome sensibilities (read: wanderlust) an insane Dolphin energy.

Cheers to my new friend and local cohort!

Mercury in Retrograde

It seems like it always happens.

The bubble bursts.

This time it took less than two months.

Unconditional love. Yeah sure.

Love of his life. Blah blah blah.

It took one reference. One. To a belief system he had no interest in. No knowledge of. No desire to understand. To shut me down.

This is the first time in this iteration.

There will be others.

A casual reference to that zany, unpredictable, sign-no-contracts phase of the stars. No alignment. Things out of whack. Askew.

One paltry mention. In passing.

If this were the 1600s and we were in Salem no doubt he'd have me burned at the stake ... or dunked in the pond. No ifs, ands or buts. But this is 2010. And hey, he's (by his own admission) a changed man. The father of a daughter. So he knows now how to be sensitive. Compassionate to his woman folk.

But no. He is curious as to what this is all about. My rigid, tied-up-in-knots friend. Wants total acceptance. But seems unwilling to turn the tables. Allow others freedom to think and be.

This is just the beginning. Or, with luck an anomaly. Fingers crossed that it is not history repeating itself.

If so, I am the dupe.

Mercury retrograde comes three times annually. It provides us the unique opportunity to adjust our thoughts, attitudes and decisions about issues and bend in a new direction as we move through 2010.

But this is numero tre. Our third foray. The last time. The charm. Right?

Mercury, the divine messenger, must really be in retrograde.

Animal Totem Redux: For Charlie on the Eve of His Journey

Cross-legged I sit on my downy white comforter, nightgown drawn above my knees in a comfortable Indian-style position. It is Charlie’s last night home. The final page of this chapter. The one of childhood fancies, teenage antics and campfire stories in the shimmering moon glow in the Colorado Rockies, boarding school studies, and college garden parties amid friends dressed to the nines. He is embarking on his life path. A journey that will take him 8000 miles from his roots to chart his future. Distancing him from his youth, but not his heart.

I place the fanned cards in front of him on the bed. A casino croupier asking him to cut the deck. Choose four. One at a time. East. South. West. North. Plus one for the middle. The sacred mountain card. We carefully place each face down, yellow lightening bolt jagged across the cobalt back. The zig-zags of life sparkling against the snowy ground, concealing his aura. A circle. Four coordinates of the compass not unlike the scratched lens of his well-worn spyglass resting on the chest of drawers in his emptying room. South toward the sea, north to Canada.

As it happened, and nothing is a coincidence, the cards Charlie selected are propitious, indeed. The more that I do these readings (with the assistance of interpretations and seasoned insights gleaned from those whose roots lie in Native American wisdom), the more connected I feel with the other beings cohabitating our planet.

So without further ado … tom-tom beating to the cadence of the earth’s rhythms, dream webs capturing the essence of our goodness filtering our negative energies to be channeled for better use … here’s what the great sky gods revealed for my Charlie.

The Medicine Wheel Spread divines those life forces and spiritual strengths shaping his spirit from four randomly selected cards. Each is placed according to the location on a compass. The fifth and final card is placed in the middle representing the present.

EAST card reveals spiritual strength. An auspicious revelation of the the major challenge blocking your path. To circumnavigate it gracefully will allow you to seek, and obtain, clarity in your present position.

East = Buffalo

This is the most sacred. The appearance of a white buffalo is a sign that prayers are heard. It shows a time of abundance and plenty, of prophecy been fulfilled. Buffalo signifies gratitude and praise, give praise for the richness of life.


SOUTH card describes how animal medicine is teaching the child within your adult self. It is what you need to trust in yourself and what you need to nurture in your growing self.

South = Turkey

Giving away is the deep abiding recognition of sacrifices of both self and others. You act and react on behalf of others. The acknowledgement that what you do for others, you do for yourself. You are being given a gift. The gift may be large or small but never insignificant. A windfall. A beautiful sunset. Or just the spirit of giving.

WEST card gives internal solutions to your present life challenge it indicates where your goals need challenge.

West = Bat

Bat is the symbol of rebirth showing death to the old way of life, breaking down all the former notions of self. It signifies ritualistic death that prepares you for rebirth. The universe is asking you in every way to grow and become your future. Acknowledge your destiny. Leverage your talents, your abilities fully. Use the agility of your mind, your steadfast courage and tensile strength to encourage and assure an easier labor.

NORTH card teaches you how you may spiritually apply and interrogate the lessons of the other directions. The animal medicine of this card is the key to walking in wisdom knowing the teacher within and connecting to the higher self.

North = Armadillo

Your boundaries of safety are part of the total being. It is a gift to set boundaries so that so that harmful words and intentions just roll off. Your lesson is in setting your own boundaries. Set up your boundaries that allow only experiences that you want to be a part of. This boundary becomes a shield and ward off things which are undesirable to you.

The SACRED MOUNTAIN card represents the present melding physical with spiritual realities in the here and now.

Sacred Mountain = Moose

The moose enjoys a job well done; and, sharing his joy. He has the innate ability to know just when to use the gentleness of a deer and when to activate the stampede of the herd. He possesses the balance of leadership with the willingness to do things himself. A leader with compassion and a strong sense of fairness. Caveat: Be mindful that ego, when unchecked, can ruin one's self of accomplishment. By growing calm for awhile, the strength and wisdom of silence fills the heart Quieting the arrogance. Stilling the buzz.

So my son, my darling Charlie, is a compassionate leader with the sensitivity, balance and sense of fairness to give to those in need. And by doing so, reaps a greater bounty. He gives of himself easily but sets reasonable boundaries for self-preservation. The world is his oyster. We already know that. And he is not only comfortable in his own skin, but intuits the needs of his fellow man. My gentle giant, a great and passionate spirit, resides in a boundaryless world. The future is his to mold. But he must take care to do so responsibly.

To the great white buffalo that resides within his soul and empowers his spirit ... cheers!

Native American Animal Totem

My darling sister Mary's high school friend, Kim, made my village home a rest over on her drive from the Berkshires in western Massachusetts to enchanting Sutton Island downeast. Kennebunkport is the mid-way point. So it was not only convenient, but provided us an opportunity to visit for a brief moment.

Kim arrived around suppertime ready for a drink so we headed into the 'port for a delectable seafood treat and a cocktail on the wharf frequented by us locals and tourists alike. The night was summer exquisite. Clear and dry. The sky tinged pink as the sea swallowed the sun giving birth to a mother of pearl moon shimmering effervescent. The river sparkled as boats returned to dock. Weary sailors pulling in the sheaths and knotting ropes. A most delightful July evening. Picture perfect by most standards.

Swatting the occasional mosquito, we sipped and chatted about mid-life job searches and the amazing possibilities spreading out in front of us. Fifty-something transitions. Not ready to hit the links or the bridge table. We each were in the process of reinventing our professional selves to give back to the communities while leveraging skills honed over the decades.

Back at my home the ceiling fans whirred breezily wafting the fresh scent of the summer's eve indoors. We talked a bit and then headed in our own directions. I could see why Mary adored Kim. She is independent, talented, resourceful, an adventurous spirit. What fun to peek into their friendship.

We met in my kitchen the following morning. A sweet start to a lovely summer day. Over berries and croissants on my screen porch, she pulled out a deck of Native American medicine cards to interpret those forces motivating my journey and igniting my path.

Kim fanned the cards in front of me as if a magic trick. Choose four, she said. One at a time. East. South. West. North. Plus one for the middle. The sacred mountain card. She placed them on the glass table matching the directional forces of a compass. It all came together.

The Medicine Wheel Spread interprets the life forces and spiritual strengths shaping one's essence from four randomly selected cards. Each is placed according to the location on a compass. The fifth and final card is placed in the middle representing the present.

East card reveals where your spiritual strength lies and indicates the direction your spiritual Path is taking. It can reveal the major challenge in seeking clarity in your present position.

East = Dolphin
Dolphins are messengers between water and sky. They are playful and intelligent. They bring the message of harmony and balance.

Dolphins speak of the breath of life. Dolphin teaches us how to release emotions. To release your tension and emotions and create a total relaxation . Dolphins are linked to creating the solution for the children of earth. A time to communicate with nature. Imitate dolphin and ride on the wave of laughter spreading joy to the world.

South card describes how animal medicine is teaching the child within you or your adult self. It is what you need to trust in yourself and what you need to nurture in your growing self.

South = Turtle
Turtle is the oldest symbol for planet earth, it is the personification of goddess energy, and the eternal mother from which our lives evolve. Turtle is protected by her shell.

In honouring the earth, we are asked by Turtle to be mindful of the cycle of give and take, to give back to the Mother as she has given to us. Like Turtle you also have shields that protect you from hurt, envy, jealousy, and the unconsciousness of others. Turtle teaches you through it's habit patterns how to use protection. You are being asked to honour the creative source within you, to be grounded to the Earth, and to observe your situation with motherly compassion.

West card gives internal solutions to your present life challenge it indicates where your goals need challenge.

West = Raven
Raven is the messenger from spirit world. He represents mystery. Bringer of Magic and Light, Creation and Knowledge

Ravens are known as the "keeper of secrets". Raven flies to us with heightened awareness and greater understanding of our consciousness. It is with this new perception that we begin seeing into the hearts of others and experience their feelings. Raven asks us to experience the transformation it brings within our multidimensional self, and be reunited with the mysteries of the universe so we can expel our inner demons.

North card teaches you how you may spiritually apply and interrogate the lessons of the other directions. The animal medicine of this card is the key to walking in wisdom knowing the teacher within and connecting to the higher self.

North = Horse
Represents strength and freedom. Horse teaches us how to use our power gracefully.

Horse is power. Physical power and unearthly power. Enter into the darkness to find the light you carry, the need of the people. You are a message carrier and the carrier of wisdom. Your power is not given lightly but awarded to those who are willing to carry responsibility in a balanced manner. True power is found in remembering your total journey. True wisdom comes from walking in another person moccasin. Compassion, caring, teaching, loving, sharing your gift, talents and abilities are the gateway to power.

The Sacred Mountain card looks at the present.It indicates how your physical and spiritual realities melded to produce at the present moment

Sacred Mountain = Beaver
The beaver is the doer in the animal kingdom with an amazing ability to build and create. Beavers can help you solve problems by creating solid solutions.

A doer is characterized by industriousness. Incorporates a strong sense of family and home. Leaves itself many alternatives routes of escape, does not paint itself in corners. Possesses the power of working at attaining achievements. Teamwork. Always considering the alternatives, lest we dam the flow of experience in our lives.

In a nutshell, this reading substantiates the me that I have become. A free spirit with a heightened self-knowledge. A doer, with great compassion, wisdom and the ability to spread laughter. I can (and do) retreat into my shell.

Those unconstructed walls need to remain crumbled. The rocks I can navigate. But I am not retreating behind a fortress. Nope. Not ever again. My innocent, playful inner child is on her way out to play.

Cheers to my sweet friend, Kim, and her colorful deck of mystical medicine cards!

Kabuki Theatre

Kabuki actors dancing not so gracefully.

Passionless.

Duplicitous.

Confused.

Begone!

Commodity Trading

It's Monday morning. The first day of my first yoga class. My inaugural foray into the ancient physical and mental discipline born in the belly of India. I am jazzed.

Not the bona fide emotion descriptor for my eager anticipation of the ancient gentle practice of awakening one's body and aligning it effortlessly to the mind and heart that awaits at the top of the wooden stairs. A few short blocks from home.

But I am.

As with every activity I fully engage my eager self. Especially the first day. My enthusiasm tempered by a serenity. A grace. Humbled by the physical embodiment of a virtuous spirit. Another path to open my heart. Breathe in embracing the impurities. Exhale and release.

Strengthen my body. Align it with my inner core. Condition my heart. Experience contentment despite the realities that exist beyond the door. Out on the street buzzing with jack hammers and back hoes as our village downtown is updated. A makeover long over due. I know. Mine is too.

I am ready.

So here I am. Dressed and ready to commence. Black dance pants. A white long sleeved top. My thick chestnut tresses pulled tight at the nape. With a few moments to spare. Reading yesterday's Sunday New York Times. In the Style section, a feature article catches my eye. The emergence of the yoga business. Trendy. Fashionable. Commoditized.

So now it appears to me that I am jumping on the bandwagon. The thought never occurred to me.

Seems everything, whether sacred or mundane morphs at the hands of greedy entrepreneurs morphed into a commodity. Wall Street and fashionistas run amok. Yoga instructors, the teachers of the teachers, reaching celeb status in New York, LA ... and Dallas. Crazy.

Yoga training symposiums held in Las Vegas fetch $1,400 for 84 postures. That's a mere $17 per. Discounts a plenty. Bring a friend. Reduce the net cost to just under $12. Hawking this ancient, spiritual practice. Selling it to the masses. Diluting its soul.

Bikram Choudhury partnered with Cheryl on Dancing with the Stars? Not so far-fetched. But can a guru tango?

Namaste.

Life Happens While You Are Busy Making Plans

It's starting to take shape.

If amorphous is a shape.

It is to me. By now you know that.

Might not be images decorating the border of pre-school walls. Or, molded perfectly for the green-orange-purple plastic Playskool form fitter where triangles, squares and circles drop neatly through perfect holes.

Or, fluffy clouds floating gracefully in cerulean blue skies. Changing. The black-green swirly ones bruising the sky causing thunder, ground strikes and worse?

What about that blue ink blob you tried not to stare at yesterday seeping from inside of the bank teller's breast pocket of his short sleeve button down petroleum byproduct shirt?

Or, a delicious scoop of pale green mint chocolate chip ice cream melting down the sides of a sugar cone on a hot, humid July afternoon.

All shapeless? Not in my world. Use imagination to weave the story. After all, this is mine to tell.

Changes. New energies. Alternatives. Strategic possibilities.

A new dimension. Gently recommended by my wise, perceptive friend. Toltec philosophy. Evolution and expansion of my eclectic belief system which already encompasses Judeo-Christian tenets, Native American wisdom, Tibetan Buddhism teachings. Changing. Incorporating ancient Latin American perspectives into the mix.

My weekend readings poignant.

Friday, April 23
Seven of Swords

Time to consult with others. You are a truthful person, but others do not always want to hear the truth. Honor and willingness to stay and face the music. You will not run from a situation just because it is uncomfortable. Someone needs to know that you are there for them.

Saturday, April 24
King of Swords

An articulate and intellectual man who is very capable in leading others in business and life. A mentor. Possessing a Solomon-like wisdom and commanding authority. A man of high moral standards and principles. Someone to be trusted in all things. Committed to the greater good.

Sunday, April 25

Ace of Cups

Continuation of love and creativity. Spiritual healing. New relationship on the horizon. Powerful creative energy harnessed for new ventures. Emotional fulfillment. Happiness and vitality. Support from community of new artistic ventures. Partnerships.

This plan of mine. My journey through my sixtieth year continues to evolve. Expanded. Embracing new opportunities, destinations, convivants.

C'mon, cosmic dealer, hit me again. Make it a good one. And keep me on this roll. To fate!

Earth Day 1970

It seems like I was everywhere during the heady, waning days of the late sixties and early seventies. I was. And, I wasn't.

But this time I was.

Forty years ago today.

Philadelphia. Dogwood and magnolia blossoms in full bloom. Us, too.

The first Earth Day. April 22, 1970. An environmental teach-in.

Propelled by a sense of urgency. Threats to the environment. The burning Cuyahoga River. Acid rain. Napalm deforestations. We were killing our earth. The penultimate wasting asset. Our home. Our neighborhood. Decaying before our eyes.

Our idealistic ... and ironically quite logical ... Woodstock Nation sensibilities threatened. Mocked by multinational corporations, crop dusters, aging coal-fueled factories and a brand spanking new interstate highway system luring Detroit's automakers to quintuple output. Trains, buses, monorails ... public transportation infrastructure be damned.

In short, the globe's natural resources were depleting rapidly before our eyes. Acid rain poured into our rivers, our streams, our fishing habitats. Life sustaining water contaminated. Shrouds of heavy yellow smog and gritty coal particles from factories raging uncontrolled polluted the skies. We were killing the planet. One neighborhood at a time. Single-handed. Headed for hell in a handbasket.

Unconscionable trade-offs. Corporate interests v the health of our unborn children's children's children. We’re simply not going to all wake up, sing Kumbaya around a cackling camp fire and tackle these problems.

Altogether some 20 million people – 10% of the U.S. population – participated in 1970 Earth Day teach-ins, marches, and rallies across the country. Nearly half were students. I was one of them. On the Earth Day organizing committee. Lured by the promise of saving our habitat. Our planet. Hand-in-hand, but of course, with brilliant, motivated, mostly good looking (if you could imagine their fresh faces sans beards) college boys from all over the east coast. My Briarcliff suite mate, Jill Gardner, dating Larry Rockefeller got us the gig. Weekly treks to either The City (New York, of course), Philadelphia or D.C.

A happening. Inspired by the Apollo 11 moon landing the prior summer. We were energized. Propelled by the Moody Blues in their lyrical, psychedelic ode to our children's children's children born from Native American wisdom.

[© 1969 Deram/Polydor. All rights reserved.]

So where are we now? These 40 years later? Same place. Same destruction. Greying hair and apathy. Good God. The more we changed, the more we stayed the same.

Treat the earth well.

It was not given to you by your parents,

it was loaned to you by your children.

We do not inherit the Earth from our Ancestors,

we borrow it from our Children.

~ Ancient Indian Saying

Our radical, forward thinking uprising morphed four decades later into an innocuous Hallmark greeting card.

Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

Namaste

My mind unfolds completely. My inaugural walk through the village with Bailey since my badly sprained ligaments benched me last month. No longer on hiatus. Total immersion. I float refreshed. Lost in the movement of placing one foot in front of the other. The familiar rhythm. My pace quickens. Adding an extra mile. Just because.

It has been forever. If forever is measured in days. Thirty-one days. And sometimes it is. Know you know what I mean.

It feels good. Being in the zone. And by zone I am not referring to the twilight one where I have been residing uneasily since my return in March from Oz 's Emerald City on the other coast. Yep. There they go. The lions, tigers and bears. Oh my. Noxious gasses ooze from the tips of my well-worn New Balance sneakers. I feel lighter, more graceful already.

But hey what gives? Is my right knee emitting a few sharp reminder pangs? Nope. Ignore it. Don't succumb. Motor through it. Persevere. They'll vanish. Step it up a notch. I'll pop two tiny blue Aleves when I get home. Not gonna let this curtail a thing. Not when I am getting back in the groove.

Zap. Oh no. Gone is the fluid dynamics of a few moments ago. Phooey. I am perplexed. And I hate confusion. Hate it. Need to come up with an alternative. Must regain mental focus. C'mon think, Alice. Think. Gotta incorporate a way to get out of my head. Let the calm wash over me. Gheesh. Here goes that strategic mind of mine. Crowding out the quietude. Scrolling through the options. What would I do? What could I do? What should I do? Damn.

I know. I know. Woulda. Coulda. Shoulda. I don't even realize I am make the sign of a cross with Baileys leash and my right hand waving frantically to ward off the evils of remorse. I am mumbling out loud now. Just under my breath. But noticeable. Bailey looks at me thinking I am saying treat. I am saying shit. Two teen age boys pass their heads spin around quickly afraid to stare at the crazy loon with the dog. The Wicked Witch of the East muttering x-rated expletives. They pedal as fast as their skinny legs will allow. Don't look back. Don't look back.

Who the hell cares what they think? I need to figure this out. Now. Begone demons lurking at the surface threatening my dreams. Dissipate you terrors wreaking havoc with my confidence. Take this. Whoosh them away, gnarly broom. Send them out into the ether world swirling. The boys are rounding the corner. Not turning their heads. I brandish a two foot stick like Zorro. Hobbling back to my house at a snail's pace.

I must find the release valve. Work out the kinks crippling my ability to move forward ... literally and figuratively. Reclaim my inner calm. Guide and re-center this journey of mine into the next chapter. Get back in touch with my long-put-away-on-the-top-shelf-of-the-closet serenity.

I halt and look up. There above Salon 96 where darling Cheryl keeps my tresses looking oh so chic is the answer. The Nataraja School of Yoga. I have passed this a bazillion times. But here it is shining effervescently. Nataraja. The cosmic dancer who performs his divine dance to destroy a weary universe and make preparations for the Hindi god Brahma to start the process of creation. God knows I am weary from the negativity of the last few weeks.

My pulse relaxes. This is it. Gentle yoga classes are offered Mondays. I can start next week.

Namaste.